January 17, 2013
The Mash’s Fashion Police squad is back to patrol the red carpet and other Hollywood spots. Some celeb styles are arresting and others just need to be arrested.
LOUISE: I have mixed opinions on this. While the print looks a little like the bedspread at my Grandma’s house, she somehow comes off as hippie chic.
SHANTAE: Soooooo … what I’m thinking is, you decided to sew your grandma’s tablecloth into a dress and thought it was OK to wear it in public.
PATRICE: I appreciate Elle trying to look older, but not THAT MUCH older.
MARIDSA: Looks like she stole the curtains from big sister Dakota’s room!
ANDREA L.: Is that a potato sack you’re wearing? The floral print is cute, but it really does wash you out, honey.
ANDREA N.: Once upon a time, Little Elle Fanning decided to venture into the woods to pick some flowers—to sew onto her dress.
KASEY: Elle, give grandma’s bedsheet back.
AFFY: Elle Fanning struts the red carpet in this wonderfully crafted … drapery.
LOUISE: I would love this outfit 10,000 times more if the cheetah print was a solid black line. But the dress is flattering nonetheless and the shoes are dangerously amazing.
SHANTAE: Color-blocking does not work with prints. It’s COLOR-blocking. And why does your cheetah print extend past the rest of your dress?
PATRICE: That’s a great dress if you need an example of what a collage looks like.
MARIDSA: Next time, leave the cheetah in the desert.
ANDREA L.: Someone forgot to finish getting dressed this morning …
ANDREA N.: Rosci’s dress designer suffered from a severe sense of indecisiveness in this three-in-one look!
KASEY: The bright blue and bold lines are an interesting contrast to the cheetah print. I like it.
AFFY: Rocsi looks stunning in this dress because the fit is perfect and the patterns don’t clash.
LOUISE: You know you’ve failed when you’re wearing a fancy watch over red gloves and a T-shirt. Please … just stop. Plus, who are you again? No one’s heard from you in like 10 years.
SHANTAE: Though young adulthood has done him well, Romeo is not quite attractive enough to get away with wearing THREE DIFFERENT SHADES OF RED.
PATRICE: Where is Romeo going dressed like that? An exclusive red carpet event or camping?
MARIDSA: Romeo, o Romeo. Where doth thou shop?
ANDREA L.: Generally, when you’re cold, you wear a jacket, not just the gloves and hat.
ANDREA N.: All right, Romeo, it’s pretty cold during the middle of winter here in Chicago, but … uh … what’s the temperature in Hollywood right now?
KASEY: Romeo, go back to being Lil’ Romeo and have your mom dress you again.
AFFY: From rapping to being the face of ICDC College, it’s apparent that Romeo can’t make up his mind on his career or his temperature. Mittens, hat and a short-sleeve shirt. Really?
LOUISE: This is not fruit world and you are not a lemon. Never again.
SHANTAE: STOP. YOU ARE NOT COMPETING WITH THE SUN.
PATRICE: Lea’s outfit would be absolutely adorable for a 4-year-old, but not for a 26-year-old. Maybe she should have traded outfits with Elle.
MARIDSA: It’s golden like the awards she doesn’t have!
ANDREA L.: It seems that she is ready to break out in one of her “Glee” performances. That ensemble is more costumey than red carpet.
ANDREA N.: In contrast to her preppy childish-chic style on “Glee,” Michele takes on a much more sophisticated look with this school bus yellow satin ensemble.
KASEY: I get you’re pulling off the Rachel Berry good girl act, but don’t hide your amazing curves with an ugly satin yellow.
AFFY: What’s unflattering, awkward and yellow all over? Lea Michele’s tutu and jacket combination.
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