Sports

Laura Bartusiak
Woodlands Academy

Favorite player: Peyton Manning
Best rivalry: The Bulls against the Heat with the Bulls winning, of course!
This sport doesn’t get enough love: women’s basketball
What should be your opponent’s sports nickname? Happy Camper

Marisa Spiegel
Walter Payton
Favorite player: Of any sport? Michael Jordan. I mean, come on! He’s Michael Flipping Jordan!

Best rivalry: Ooooohhh, I’m gonna have to go with White Sox vs. Cubs. Everybody gets really into it but, in the end, it’s really just a nice little confidence booster for us Sox fans.
This sport doesn’t get enough love: Badminton! I used to not think much of it at all, but we played it in P.E. one year and, sheesh, it gets intense!
What should be your opponent’s sports nickname? Laura a.k.a. I Totally Think Spiegs’ Answers Are Better (or ITTSAAB–pronounced just as it’s spelled) Bartusiak!

The Bulls face their toughest opponent so far this season when they host the Oklahoma City Thunder (7 p.m. Thursday, TNT). What else does “OKC” stand for?
LAURA:
Obsolete Klutzy Chums

SPIEGS: The “Eh, I guess they’re OK, City.”

Metta World Peace stars as Detective Garlan Fincher in a Lifetime movie with Jennie Garth called “The Eleventh Victim.” Cast an equally ridiculous sounding movie premise using another athlete and actor.
LAURA: Tom Brady stars as a normal human with a normal job in the film “Undercover Football Players” alongside Angelina Jolie, who plays his boss.

SPIEGS: “The Meticulous Fisher” staring Devin Hester (but he’ll have to grow out his hair again). Watch as this undercover cat burglar (and yes, he actually burgles for cats) searches for the mystical Mountain Mediterranean Gold Coated Trout-Flounder to effectively lure in the stubborn cat of that 4-year-old two doors down.

“Skyfall” opens on Friday. Who is the James Bond of sports?
LAURA: LeBron James, because he “dresses to kill.”

SPIEGS: Shhhh! That’s top secret information! We can’t have that leaked out, now, can we!?!

Futuristic Woo’s at it again. This time Flo Rida hired the company to design uniforms for his old high school’s football team, the Carol City Chiefs. Your reaction in five words or less.
LAURA: That face … on those pants?

SPIEGS: Ummm … that needs changing. Straightaway.

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About The Mash

Maura Wall Hernandez is digital editor of The Mash.

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