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Saturday after saving for months to get a new iPod, I walk into Best Buy and happily buy the iPod Nano. IT IS AMAZING! more

 
Michael Cera at least looks like a real rocker in his latest movie, “Scott Pilgrim vs. the World,” which is based on a series of hilarious … more
  
March 21—April 19
Aries
Sometimes you outgrow old friends, and it’s OK to admit that. Pluto is showing you it’s time to move forward and get to know some interesting new people.
April 20—May 20
Taurus
Try not to be too critical of what a friend or family member is doing. The moon is putting you in one of your picky moods. Be more understanding and remember that nobody is perfect.
March 21—April 19
Gemini
You could feel like you’re caught up in a soap opera this week. Your boyfriend or girlfriend could be freaking out about something. The moon is telling you to stay cool.
June 21—July 22
Cancer
The sun says you need to get more organized. Right now you have many projects and classes, and you need to stay on top of all of your work.
July 23—Aug. 22
Leo
You give so much to other people, and sometimes you give a little too much. Venus is reminding you that it’s OK to have a big heart. But don’t let people walk all over you.
Aug. 23—Sept. 22
Virgo
You could receive a high grade on a test or a report as the sun boosts your luck. Friendships are going well too. You’ll have lots of fun this week.
Sept. 23—Oct. 22
Libra
It’s important to do what your heart tells you. Be honest with your friends about what is really going on. Mercury says be truthful.
Oct. 23—Nov. 21
Scorpio
A friendly moon is encouraging you to socialize. You could attend a great concert or spend time at a fabulous party. Enjoy yourself.
Nov. 22-Dec. 21
Sagittarius
You’re the class comedian, and you love making people feel good. But this week your sassy comments could hurt someone’s feelings. Mars says be nice.
Dec. 22—Jan. 19
Capricorn
Don’t stay stuck in a rut. The sun is telling you to try new things instead of always watching the same TV shows or hanging out with the same people.
Jan. 20—Feb. 18
Aquarius
With the moon opposite your sign, you might need some time by yourself this week. If you feel low, relax with a good book or a funny video.
Feb. 19-March 20
Pisces
You can be too shy sometimes. Venus is telling you to be more confident. Don’t be afraid to ask that certain someone out for a hot date.
Breakout
Your success style
If you’re a Taurus, you’re the type who sticks with something until you succeed. Whether it’s training for a marathon, working out or winning over the heart of someone special, you know how to make things happen. This week your hard work could earn you some killer grades on a test or research paper.

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How would that alligator spotted in the Chicago River explain why he's here?

'Hey, can't an alligator be a tourist, too?'
'You try navigating to Florida without a GPS.'
'I came to bite Blago.'
'As an avid meat-lover, I came for the hot dogs.'
Other--write your answer in the comments!
 


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